Saturday, 5 June 2010

One Archbishop Duffs Up Another

Hi. It's your Archbishop Fred Hits Parade here, fronting the more respectable end of North American Anglicanism. Ha ha. Not that we get treated much differently by some.

Well, we keep apologising for what we did to native Indians here, and we shall have to keep on apologising. We started in 1993: no one stop apologising. Plus we are all settled and stuck on this large forested landmass now. So sorry again. And we can do the ADRIAP - and pity that the Alternative Dispute Resolution wasn't followed by Independent Assessment Necessities - as an act of good faith among generations of hurt. Sorry yet again. Sorry and, er, sorry.

Now, oh do we have to? This Communion business. Well, we are in it to win it but some would have us out of it.

First of all, there is a huge carpet where we are meeting at General Synod, and a number of long handled brushes available. We really ought to let our southern neighbours press on more quickly than us, to take most of the attention, and then we can sort of get on with it later. This is what the Spirit is saying to me. I know that our deliberations on these matters will be watched by many within Canada and around the world. I hope they see a Church sensitive to the variety of contexts, particularly the one where our southern neighbour can get clobbered first..

Now we have been dealing with some foreign agents called Pastoral Visitors. I know some of you regard them as poking their noses into our business, but I would urge you to look at the lsame arge carpet regarding those sort of remarks. But we need a Pastoral Statement so that these foreigners can be satisfied that minority views get some space and go away to report to the old colonialist headteacher in purple that we are good boys and girls. Well the minority can stand on top of the carpet, as we all do.

All which neatly brings me to the Covenant, as it continues to hobble along. In this case, well, I think it's the same: we want the other North Americans to move faster. And you are not going to find me using the direct language of Kathy Jefferson Shoreline.

Look, how the hell can you be in a conversation if one of the consequences of actions is that you cannot speak? This Covenant and its section four represents nothing other than principles of exclusion. We cannot struggle to hear the voice of the Spirit if we are all muffled by the pathetic Archbishop of Anglicanism, where only his voice is heard in whatever he is saying from one minute to the next, as in his Pentecost letter, the old colonialist.

No, I am far more reserved than my southern colleague and her sharp American tongue.

Now we cannot be in the direct firing line because we have not made a "formal" position to either consecrate gay and lesbian bishops or have same sex outings. We are like the English - we still do it informally, with double standards. This is the correct way of proceeding, according to the Archbishop and his Covenant and its Standing Committee before the thing has even been adopted. But let me say this quietly, because I understand the role of diplomacy here and do not want to upset the old colonialist in England.

And what about the border crossers? He includes them for shut-up punishment but I don't see any serious moves in that direction, no sticky tape going down to parts of the Global South, and they cause far more havoc and wreckage with their deliberate car crashing coming north to our neck of the woods. Compare that with our ability, like the English, to sweep things under the carpet and act in a 'what you say is not what you see' manner.

We know why he said "formally" in taking a position - it is so that the Church of England can carry on with same sex blessings and gay bishops without sanction and not be one of those silence by the Covenant. Ha ha, that would be a turn up for the books. The only Southern Cone they seem to want is one bought in Kent that they stick a 99 into, ha ha, whereas we have to put up with that blue-haired chappee going south to come north. Not that it will stop them coming to the British Isles with their Fellowship of Confessing Believers and their Anglican Church of Northern Europe. You see if I'm not right, though I wouldn't suggest this too stridently.

But let us be positive about the Covenant. We are not like the United States here you know. We can set up working groups and discussion methods that stretch it out well beyond what the middle Americans intend to do. Should The Episcopalian Church say that they'll reject it, then we might find that we have the balls to do the same. In the meantime that ever so big carpet needs to come in handy again, as we carry on speaking within the Communion, if anyone else is listening.

Meanwhile, sorry to the natives, again. Sorry. Yes, sorry.

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