Wednesday 12 August 2009

Literacy Required

When is someone going to improve the standard of English in Nigeria? If you are going to do a scam, at least do it with some credible English.

OFFICE OF THE SENATE HOUSE FEDERAL REPUBLIC OF NIGERIA COMMITTEE ON FOREIGN PAYMENT (RESOLUTIONPANEL ON CONTRACT PAYMENT) IKOYI-LAGOS NIGERIA

Attn: ATM Card Fund Beneficiary Ref: Payment/notification/2009 Email:info_atmfundscentre77234@ymail.com

NOTIFICATION OF READINESS OF PAYMENT OF YOUR INHERITANCE FUND OF($4.6 MILLION) BY INTERNATIONAL ATM CARD. This is to inform you that your payment entitlement of has been fully withdrawn from the Remittance Department of the Central Bank After several complains from Foreign beneficiaries through the Attorney General of the Federation, the High commission in the UK and also the United Nations Secretary General. This funds where yesterday returned to the Federal Ministry of Finance reserve account with the Central Bank of Nigeria.

After a just concluded meeting amongst the Federal House of Senator, I Senator Charles Kuramo under the new Government of President Umaru Yar'Adua in conjunction with the just concluded meeting by the Former President of United States and Great Britain, has been a ppointed tohead this federal Board in regards to the settlement of your entitlement upon it return back to the Government purse with the central Bank of Nigeria.

Because of so many International Banking rules unfavorable to 3rd world countries like Nigeria in regards to transfer of large amount of monies, the federal Republic of Nigeria via the federal Government has decided to settle all foreign payment by theissuance of an International Valid ATM CARD from a reliable Bank here in Nigeria.

This would allow and enable all beneficiaries to access there ATM CARD from any ATM machine in any part of the world. As soon as the below information is secured from you, it would be passed to the appointed bank to issue an International ATM CARD in your favor and it would be sent to you via a GPS (Global Postal Service)for delivery.

The below information is required from you,

(1)Full Name:................

(2)Address:..................

(3)Phone Number:.............

CONTACT INTEGRATED PAYMENT DEPARTMENT WITH THE DETAILS BELOW:

Contact Name: Mr.John Pedro

[etc.]

Meanwhile we all wait for Peter Akinola's latest reaction to the Reflections, and will study the English to see if it comes from him or some of his Western string-pulling operatives.

6 comments:

Fr Craig said...

yeah... where is Big Pete these days??
hadn't seen the ATM scam...

Erika Baker said...

Pluralist,
this is not a poorly written scam but a very clear offer. And a bargain to boot.
I will explain it all to you as soon as you have made an interim deposit of £10000 into my bank account.
Do not fear, all will become very crystal clear.

john said...

I have to say I find this racist.

Pluralist (Adrian Worsfold) said...

What, you mean the standard of English coming out of Nigeria in this example where you'd expect it to be somewhat more convincing? Have you read Akinola's pieces direct and those where the editing has been rather more creative?

Don't be so sensitive in your rush to label.

john said...

No. I find you racist. There are some - I presume - Nigerians whose first language is English. This is not true of many - I don't know the percentage. It ill behoves monoglot Brits to castigate other people's command of English. Your own English is frequently sloppy and sometimes ungrammatical. But you are a native speaker.

For me, this posting illustrates the desperate and opportunist postings of people who - despite all the razzmatazz and superficial sopphistication - see everything in terms of crude polarisations and generalisations. So: Peter Akinola bad (I agree); Akinola Nigerian (indisputable); poor English on a Nigerian scam. Hey-ho! Opportunity for Pluralist to display his one-dimensional sophistication.

Pluralist (Adrian Worsfold) said...

You don't know the meaning of racism, but that's your last comment on this subject here.